Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
