Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
Randomize
