real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Randomize
