Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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