If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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