i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize