im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I could make wine with my vomit
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Randomize