question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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