I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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