Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
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Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
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