Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Randomize
