Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Randomize
