The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
time to smoke my breakfast
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
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