sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
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