this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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