i don't like sucking hair
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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