i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Randomize
