she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
