Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Never joke about your clitoris.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
