weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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