We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize
