that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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