I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
