the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Randomize
