she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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