I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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