Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
