You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I don't deserve a penis
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Randomize
