You can't special order awesome
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
