Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
Randomize
