you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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