they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Randomize
