Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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