It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
