If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize