He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I FOUND THE LEGS
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
