she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
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