Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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