It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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