Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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