at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
