ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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