a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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