break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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