his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
