I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
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