he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
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