I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Randomize
