This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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