He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
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