do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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